“Let us liberate ourselves from any form of control. Let us focus at the inner drum, where the rhythm aligns with that of our heart. The measure of responsibility, equals to the need for evolution. Just listen, the inner child, let it whisper in your ear.
O ne of the most difficult things in the world to do is, connecting with yourself at a deep level.
Even with years of practice and study, it is very easy to become disconnected, to become swept up in the thousands (if not millions) of distractions that we humans have created for ourselves over time.
There are a million things to distract you if you let them; e-mails, television, social engagements, bills, games, promotion. There are also a thousand different scripts running in your head that may be causing you to behave in a way that is not true to who you really are. Finally, there are hundreds of external scripts. There may be different names we call them: pressures from society, family pressures, expectations of friends, expectations from your job. All these things can prevent you from having a valuable connection with yourself if you let them.
You see, everything is trying to complete itself in this world and we are no different. We search for what we believe is missing, to fill the gaps; to complete ourselves. If only the world taught us we are already born complete, but it seems to teach us the opposite; digging a huge hole in us that we try to fill — too often in destructive ways. I would like to say I searched for my completion with intelligence, deliberation and dignity, but it was more like an awkward fumbling; like stubbing your toe in a dark room. Sometimes I reacted more like a wild animal than a dignified person. At some point in your life, you start to ask yourself the question of whether or not you can get through that dark room without breaking your leg. You start thinking that there must be a better way to learn the lessons that you need to learn, without so much pain. Yes, I would like to say that it was because of my brilliance that I found wisdom and completion; that would’ve been nice, but it’s not true. Pain was my compass in life. Unease and fear were my guides; not angels, but my own demons. Challenges is one of life’s greatest teachers. And if you’re not a very good student, then these teachings will be continually tragic thus begs the need to learn the lessons of life over and over again.
The thing is, for a little while now, we have acknowledged the external pressures. A large number of people have more choice and freedom in the world than they did a few decades ago. Globally we have a long way to go with this but we have made a start on eradicating the pressures that society puts on us.
The distractions of day-to-day life can be combatted with discipline. Meditation is a great way to do this and walks in nature are another. Make the decision to switch-off any electrical devices for an hour everyday to talk with your family for example. Although this requires lot of commitment, am still learning to keep it. I’m not that perfect you know.
The conclusion is that it is possible to extract yourself from these daily distractions if you make the choice to.
Those internal scripts are incredibly powerful and form part of the reason that makes it so difficult to connect with yourself at a deep level. One example of this, is the internal script around love. Those who have been denied love in their childhood are prone to developing an internal script that tells them they don’t deserve love. This can be carried into adulthood and might cause dysfunctional relationships or a lack of loving relationships in their life.
However, love is something that is true for each and every human being. The challenge therefore is to connect with yourself at a level that is deeper than the script that says love isn’t true in your life.
Having a Mantra could also help in Connecting with yourself at a level that is deeper than the scripts that you have inherited.
It takes great courage to access that deep level of connection. It is unknown and it is uncertain for anyone who isn’t familiar with connecting with themselves. During childhood, particularly from the age of 0-7 years we are most naturally connected to our true selves. What tends to happen as we get older is that we lose that connection as a result of the scripts of those around us.
So as well as having numerous distractions that might prevent a connection, it is made even more difficult to connect with yourself at a deep level when it is something that most people are taught not to do in their most formative years.
Whilst it is challenging to do for a number of reasons, it is the most important thing in the world today to connect with yourself at a deep level.
It is the foundation for how we connect with each other and our connections with each other that is a fundamental part of what makes us human.
We are all children that need nurturing, love and care. So give your inner child that nurturing and love, give yourself back the joy of preparing healthy and nutritious meals, joy of experiencing food without TV, reading, working, rush.
Nataša Nuit Pantović
Over to you: Do you think connecting with ourselves is the most or one of the most fundamental part of what makes us human? When did you connect to yourself?